One of the things that has occupied my thoughts lately whenever an occasion arises where I should give a gift is the idea of charitable giving. There are so many people in need and so many gifts that each of us buy and give people that we know they may never use and that certainly has no positive impact on their lives. Why don't we give a charitable gift?
This website allows gifts to be given through Unicef. They sell everything from mosquito nets to emergency schools.
http://inspiredgifts.unicefusa.org/site/PageServer?pagename=ig_homepage
This website is Canadian and allows the purchaser to essentially buy a charitable gift certificate. The recipient can then go online and donate it to the charity of their choice.
http://www.canadahelps.org/GiftCards/CharityGiftCard.aspx
At this link on the Oxfam website you can give "A gift of peace":
http://www.oxfam.ca/what-you-can-do/make-a-donation/gift-of-peace
Why don't we do this kind of stuff? Lack of awareness? Afraid the person getting it won't appreciate it? That we'll somehow look cheap? Somehow it's better that we give yet another Christmas ornament or gift card to people who already have everything than give something that allows us to collaborate on making a real difference in someone's life. I just don't get it.
Sunday, June 28, 2009
Live Is Lived In The Moment-The Best E-mail I Ever Received
Here is a portion of an e-mail from a "wise elder". It came in response to me generally bemoaning some run of the mill problem that had happened to me.
An ancient like Lao Tzu, or a modern like Sharma, all have the same prescription. Don't be such a fucking materialist. Smile and pay up. Laugh and fuck your brains out. There is no pre-ordained path for you. Life is lived in the moment. Your happiness depends less on what you have and infinitely more on how you manage your desires and expectations. And here is my crack-pot advice- your only particle of control is over your mind and it's attitudes. Life is all about magic- love it, live it.
In my opinion that passage is just awesome.
An ancient like Lao Tzu, or a modern like Sharma, all have the same prescription. Don't be such a fucking materialist. Smile and pay up. Laugh and fuck your brains out. There is no pre-ordained path for you. Life is lived in the moment. Your happiness depends less on what you have and infinitely more on how you manage your desires and expectations. And here is my crack-pot advice- your only particle of control is over your mind and it's attitudes. Life is all about magic- love it, live it.
In my opinion that passage is just awesome.
Friday, June 26, 2009
The Translucent View
A passage from the Translucent View by Arjuna Ardagh.
Highly connected parenting may seem overwhelming, too much work for a busy parent, a luxury we need to postpone for later. By making parenting into a translucent practice, not only do we usher in more wakefulness, but our parenting also becomes much easier. Recently, while grocery shopping, I passed an aisle where a small child was screaming. She was refusing to walk, and her mother, who looked extremely stressed, was dragging her by the arm away from the freezer. A battle about ice cream was under way. Finally, the mother picked her daughter up by the arm. There she was, dangling in midair. Her screams became louder. Her embarrassed mother yelled at her daughter to be quiet and finally hit her. It didn’t work too well. The child screamed even louder. I winced and moved on. We often see these kinds of battles, where parents are imposing discipline. It hurts. I am always reminded of how easily I used to go in that direction myself as a dad, before the boys were bigger and stronger than I am!
A few minutes later, I was standing in line at the cash register, behind a woman with her young son. Chocolates and candies were on display by the counter. The young boy took a chocolate, nudged his mother, and looked up at her hopefully. I watched as his mother turned and looked, not at her son but right into her son with absolute attention and focus. Smiling, she reached out and touched the boy’s hair. I was transfixed, energized by how much presence and love went into that look. If you tried to translate that look into words it would be: “I totally adore you, I am here for you no matter what you do, I care for you completely.” The boy’s mother did not say a word. She didn’t even need to shake her head. Her son just laughed and put back the chocolate. Many parents, however translucent, think of their children’s demands as a bottomless pit; that if they give in to their demands today, they will want even more tomorrow.
In Vickie Falcone’s experience, children’s requests for things like sweets, television, more new plastic stuff are actually an attempt to fulfill what she sees as their most basic needs. She uses the acronym PHIL to represent them: children need to feel Powerful, Heard, Important, and Loved. What matters most in shifting to greater translucence in parenting is the ability to translate what the child is asking for into a call for their deepest needs to be met. Chocolate becomes irrelevant when a child gets the deep attention and connection he was really asking for. Once we recognize the hidden mechanics, the rest becomes simple. Once basic needs have been met, the demands for external things lessen, and power struggles often subside. This does not take time as much as presence and our willingness to shift into translucence.
Great thought I just heard.
The Law of the Garbage Truck
How often do you let other people's nonsense change your mood? Do you let a bad driver, rude waiter, curt boss, or an insensitive employee ruin your day? For an instant, you're probably set back on your heels. However, the mark of a successful person is how quickly she can get back her focus on what's important.
Sixteen years ago I learned this lesson. I learned it in the back of a New York City taxi cab. Here's what happened.
I hopped in a taxi, and we took off for Grand Central Station. We were driving in the right lane when, all of a sudden, a black car jumped out of a parking space right in front of us. My taxi driver slammed on his breaks, skidded, and missed the other car's back end by just inches!
The driver of the other car, the guy who almost caused a big accident, whipped his head around and started yelling bad word sat us. My taxi driver just smiled and waved at the guy. And I mean, he was friendly. So, I said, "Why did you just do that? This guy almost ruined your car and sent us to the hospital!" And this is when my taxi driver told me what I now call, "The Law of the Garbage Truck."
Many people are like garbage trucks. They run around full of garbage, full of frustration, full of anger, and full of disappointment. As their garbage piles up, they need a place to dump it. And if you let them, they'll dump it on you. When someone wants to dump on you, don't take it personally. You just smile, wave, wish them well, and move on. You'll be happy you did. So this was it: "The Law of the Garbage Truck."
I started thinking, how often do I let Garbage Trucks run right over me? And how often do I take their garbage and spread it to other people: at work, at home, on the streets? It was that day I said, "I'm not going to do it anymore."
I began to see garbage trucks. I see the load they're carrying. I see them coming to drop it off. And like my taxi driver, I don't make it a personal thing; I just smile, wave, wish them well, and move on.
This story is from David J. Pollay.
Sixteen years ago I learned this lesson. I learned it in the back of a New York City taxi cab. Here's what happened.
I hopped in a taxi, and we took off for Grand Central Station. We were driving in the right lane when, all of a sudden, a black car jumped out of a parking space right in front of us. My taxi driver slammed on his breaks, skidded, and missed the other car's back end by just inches!
The driver of the other car, the guy who almost caused a big accident, whipped his head around and started yelling bad word sat us. My taxi driver just smiled and waved at the guy. And I mean, he was friendly. So, I said, "Why did you just do that? This guy almost ruined your car and sent us to the hospital!" And this is when my taxi driver told me what I now call, "The Law of the Garbage Truck."
Many people are like garbage trucks. They run around full of garbage, full of frustration, full of anger, and full of disappointment. As their garbage piles up, they need a place to dump it. And if you let them, they'll dump it on you. When someone wants to dump on you, don't take it personally. You just smile, wave, wish them well, and move on. You'll be happy you did. So this was it: "The Law of the Garbage Truck."
I started thinking, how often do I let Garbage Trucks run right over me? And how often do I take their garbage and spread it to other people: at work, at home, on the streets? It was that day I said, "I'm not going to do it anymore."
I began to see garbage trucks. I see the load they're carrying. I see them coming to drop it off. And like my taxi driver, I don't make it a personal thing; I just smile, wave, wish them well, and move on.
This story is from David J. Pollay.
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
The Old Man and His Luck.
Old Man and Luck
There once was very poor man living in a village who had a very fine horse. So fine, in fact, that the lord of the castle wanted to buy it. But the old man always refused. "To me this horse is not merely an animal. He's a friend. How could I sell you my friend?" One morning he went to the stable and found his horse gone. All the villagers said, "We told you! You should have sold your horse. Now he's been stolen instead. What terrible luck." "Bad luck or good luck," the old man said. "Who can say?" Everyone laughed at him. But 15 days later the horse returned, followed by a whole herd of wild horses. He had escaped from the
stable, courted a young mare, and returned with the rest of the herd following behind! "What luck!" the villagers cried. The old man and his son began training the wild horses. But a week later the man's son broke his leg trying to train one of
the horses. "Bad luck," said his friends. "What are you going to do now without your son to help you? You who are already so poor."
"Bad luck, good luck, who can say?" the old man replied. A few days later an army belonging to the lord of the land passed through the village and forced all the young men to become soldiers. All... except the old man's son, because of his broken leg. "How lucky you are," the villagers cried. "All our children are gone to war, but you've been able to keep your son. Our sons will probably be killed..." The old man replied, "Bad luck, good luck... who can say?"
There once was very poor man living in a village who had a very fine horse. So fine, in fact, that the lord of the castle wanted to buy it. But the old man always refused. "To me this horse is not merely an animal. He's a friend. How could I sell you my friend?" One morning he went to the stable and found his horse gone. All the villagers said, "We told you! You should have sold your horse. Now he's been stolen instead. What terrible luck." "Bad luck or good luck," the old man said. "Who can say?" Everyone laughed at him. But 15 days later the horse returned, followed by a whole herd of wild horses. He had escaped from the
stable, courted a young mare, and returned with the rest of the herd following behind! "What luck!" the villagers cried. The old man and his son began training the wild horses. But a week later the man's son broke his leg trying to train one of
the horses. "Bad luck," said his friends. "What are you going to do now without your son to help you? You who are already so poor."
"Bad luck, good luck, who can say?" the old man replied. A few days later an army belonging to the lord of the land passed through the village and forced all the young men to become soldiers. All... except the old man's son, because of his broken leg. "How lucky you are," the villagers cried. "All our children are gone to war, but you've been able to keep your son. Our sons will probably be killed..." The old man replied, "Bad luck, good luck... who can say?"
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Interesting article on stress, happiness etc.
An interesting article that speaks to how our stress, mood swings etc. are more about our expectations and our reactions than about the situations.
http://arjunaardagh.wordpress.com/2009/04/18/playing-to-play/#more-66
http://arjunaardagh.wordpress.com/2009/04/18/playing-to-play/#more-66
Be The Change
One of my favorite quotes is Gandhi's: "You must be the change you wish to see in the world". I found this great poem on Arjuna Ardagh's blog:
When you notice yourself wanting something from your partner,
Stop and label it.
I need your respect;
I need you to clean up after yourself;
I need you to notice how much I do for you.
Once you become aware of the need for certain qualities in this way,
Give what you hope to receive.
If you are demanding respect from your partner,
Give your partner respect.
If you are demanding to be heard by your partner,
Make a practice of hearing.
If you are demanding that your partner be more mindful,
Try to pay closer attention to each moment.
Shift the attention from the trickle
You hope to elicit from outside,
To the ocean that you can become within yourself.
You can follow Arjuna on Twitter or see his blog The Translucent View at: http://arjunaardagh.wordpress.com/
When you notice yourself wanting something from your partner,
Stop and label it.
I need your respect;
I need you to clean up after yourself;
I need you to notice how much I do for you.
Once you become aware of the need for certain qualities in this way,
Give what you hope to receive.
If you are demanding respect from your partner,
Give your partner respect.
If you are demanding to be heard by your partner,
Make a practice of hearing.
If you are demanding that your partner be more mindful,
Try to pay closer attention to each moment.
Shift the attention from the trickle
You hope to elicit from outside,
To the ocean that you can become within yourself.
You can follow Arjuna on Twitter or see his blog The Translucent View at: http://arjunaardagh.wordpress.com/
Father's Day.
Read a great quote this morning: "We carry adolescence around in our bodies all our lives. We get through the Car Crash Age alive and cruise through our early twenties as cool dudes, wily, dashing, winsome . . . shooting baskets, the breeze, the moon, and then we try to become caring men, good husbands, great fathers, good citizens." This really speaks to me. At 37 I think I'm at the edge of that part where I still like to think I'm cool but now my big priorities are all the ones mentioned here. When I reset my priorities for life over Christmas 07 the three I listed were great husband, great father and leader in the community.
For me Father's Day raises a bunch of conflicting emotions. Is it about me or about my Dad? Is it my day as everyone points out or should I spend it with my children? Friends I know choose to have it as their day and have nothing to do with the children. They go play golf or enjoy other pursuits of their own interest. Personally I like to take a bit of time for myself to relax but really I want to spend it with the kids. That's just me though. I'm on the end of the spectrum that gives up almost everything for the kids. With my daughter now being seven I find I'm very aware that the window will close one day where all she wants to do is be with me. So this morning I'm going to take the kids to the park.
Some interesting links:
http://www.menshealth.com/cda/article.do?site=MensHealth&channel=guy.wisdom&category=family.guy&conitem=65f2313965a85110VgnVCM10000013281eac____
http://www.menshealth.com/cda/article.do?site=MensHealth&channel=guy.wisdom&category=family.guy&conitem=f8e4d875790e9110VgnVCM20000012281eac____
For me Father's Day raises a bunch of conflicting emotions. Is it about me or about my Dad? Is it my day as everyone points out or should I spend it with my children? Friends I know choose to have it as their day and have nothing to do with the children. They go play golf or enjoy other pursuits of their own interest. Personally I like to take a bit of time for myself to relax but really I want to spend it with the kids. That's just me though. I'm on the end of the spectrum that gives up almost everything for the kids. With my daughter now being seven I find I'm very aware that the window will close one day where all she wants to do is be with me. So this morning I'm going to take the kids to the park.
Some interesting links:
http://www.menshealth.com/cda/article.do?site=MensHealth&channel=guy.wisdom&category=family.guy&conitem=65f2313965a85110VgnVCM10000013281eac____
http://www.menshealth.com/cda/article.do?site=MensHealth&channel=guy.wisdom&category=family.guy&conitem=f8e4d875790e9110VgnVCM20000012281eac____
I kept hearing about Twitter. How great it is, how it's growing so fast, how it's going to change the world etc. People at work ask me about it. Contrary to popular belief I think a bunch of mid thirty to mid forty year olds aren't checking out new things like this as often as people are led to believe. Everyone thinks they are the only ones not keeping up with the tech stuff but I think that's a myth. Anyway so I decided to check it out. I'll be honest: I just didn't get it. I didn't find many friends there, I didn't find it easy to look for people I know and I didn't really find that I wanted to be updating a short status like that or reading other people's updates. So I tried it for a few days and was tempted to bail. Then I got looking at my friend Jude's list of people that she follows. I saw famous people that interested me. Like Oprah. The light bulb went on. I had heard that famous people "tweet". So I started searching for people that inspire me. I found lots of them: Robin Sharma, Tony Robbins, Stephen Covey. I also added a few fantasy sports sites. Now I had a revelation and I found the Twitter use that was for me. I check it a couple of times a day. I get fantasy sports updates that allow me to be "in the loop" without having to go to different websites and more importantly for me I get motivation and inspiration from some of the tweets from the people that I follow.
Here's one from the other day: Robin Sharma: When you start to notice more of the good things in others they'll begin to notice more of the great things within themselves
And another: Siona: Never focus on anything that isn't great. - P. Richards
My point is: Twitter is what you make it. Don't discount it because you aren't someone who is going to want to post updates or read your friend's updates. If you're into news or recipes or Oprah check it out. Get on and follow those people. I think you'll be pleasently surprised. I know I have found a use for it that I love.
Here's one from the other day: Robin Sharma: When you start to notice more of the good things in others they'll begin to notice more of the great things within themselves
And another: Siona: Never focus on anything that isn't great. - P. Richards
My point is: Twitter is what you make it. Don't discount it because you aren't someone who is going to want to post updates or read your friend's updates. If you're into news or recipes or Oprah check it out. Get on and follow those people. I think you'll be pleasently surprised. I know I have found a use for it that I love.
Saturday, June 20, 2009
Favorite Video Clips That Inspire Me
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R9ya9BXClRw&feature=fvst
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=42E2fAWM6rA
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lODgikJa9tI
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zyGEEamz7ZM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KEMEBBwO6J8
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1sd1tgV2-_g
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uASVzkrEKgs
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q4880PJnO2E
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wqU39qGfeGA
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=640BQNxB5mc
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LTO_dZUvbJA
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=afv5jTrC7nM&feature=PlayList&p=B4887714CFACDDE8&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&index=6
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RcYv5x6gZTA
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=42E2fAWM6rA
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lODgikJa9tI
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zyGEEamz7ZM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KEMEBBwO6J8
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1sd1tgV2-_g
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uASVzkrEKgs
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q4880PJnO2E
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wqU39qGfeGA
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=640BQNxB5mc
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LTO_dZUvbJA
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=afv5jTrC7nM&feature=PlayList&p=B4887714CFACDDE8&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&index=6
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RcYv5x6gZTA
Favorite Quotes I've Been Collecting
Being righteous and being self-righteous are at the opposite ends of the spectrum. It’s the difference between people who are full of themselves versus people who do the right thing. Who do you choose? How do you want to be perceived? A life well lived is a life where being right is not the be-all end-all. The be-all end-all is a life well lived.
This is the true joy of life....being used for a purpose recognized by yourself as a mighty one....being a force of nature instead of a feverish selfish little clod of ailments and grievances complaining that the world will not devote itself to making you happy....I am of the opinion that my life belongs to the whole community and as long as I live it is my privilege to do for it whatever I can. I want to be thoroughly used up when I die. For the harder I work the more I live.
'What if today is the day? Am I ready? Am I doing all I need to do? Am I being the person I want to be?'
The best remedy for a short temper is a long walk.
Action is the foundation of success.
Experience is what you get when you don't get what you want.
"What you do speaks so loudly I can't hear what you say".
What you get in life is what you have the courage to ask for.
The happiest people don’t necessarily have the best of everything. They just
make the best of everything.
If you could kick the person responsible for most of your troubles, you would not be able to sit down for six months.
We are where we are because of the choices that we make for ourselves.
Life is what happens while you're busy making excuses.
It is amazing what can be accomplished,
When you don't care who gets the credit.
The only person you need to prove anything to
is yourself.
Luck is when preparation meets opportunity.
While it is wise to learn from experience it is wiser to learn from the experience of others.
Life isn't about how to survive the storm but how to dance in the rain.
Try not to become a man of success but rather try to become a man of value.
All my growth and development led me to believe that if you really do the right thing, and if you play by the rules, and if you've got good enough, solid judgment and common sense, that you're going to be able to do whatever you want to do with your life.
My will shall shape the future. Whether I fail or succeed shall be no man's doing but my own. I am the force; I can clear any obstacle before me or I can be lost in the maze. My choice; my responsibility; win or lose, only I hold the key to my destiny.
Shallow men believe in luck. Strong men believe in cause and effect.
The best sermon is a good example.
We must live what we want others to learn.
If you don't like something change it.
If you can't change it change your attitude.
Don't complain.
When I die I want people to be able to tell the difference.
If others can do such wonderful things why can't I?
It doesn't matter how long you have forgotten only how soon you remember.
Happiness hates the timid.
Leadership is doing what is right when nobody is watching.
Too many people don't care what happens so long as it doesn't happen to them.
Stop wishing for fewer problems and start searching for greater wisdom.
Don't be so busy striving to make a living that you forget to live a life.
"The definition of success--To laugh much; to win respect of intelligent persons and the affections of children; to earn the approbation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty; to find the best in others; to give one's self; to leave the world a little better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch, or a redeemed social condition.; to have played and laughed with enthusiasm, and sung with exultation; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived--this is to have succeeded." -
"You don't get to choose how you're going to die. Or when. You can only decide how you're going to live. Now."
The best things in life aren't things.
Happiness comes not from getting what you want but wanting what you have.
...lived as an ordinary man willing to say extraordinary things and then, with the highest amount of integrity, live the principles he prescribed, to walk his talk with humility and grace.
You are what you do. First do good, then feel good.
The more you behave in certain ways the more it comes to define you, not only to others but to yourself.
I have changed my life from talking, whining, rehashing, complaining and suffering into a life of doing and enduring because I got tired. I got tired of MAKING THE CHOICE to have a bad attitude. I realized that I alone am responsible for my behaviours and moods and whining and the rest of that nonsense is futile to resolution and problem solving.
When he was growing up my son constantly asked for piggyback rides. Though I knew how much he loved them, I was always too busy to play with him. I had reports to read or meetings to attend or calls to make. Now that he has grown up and left home, I have realized one thing: I would give anything in the world to give that boy a piggyback ride.
If it's going to be it's up to me.
The more you are as a person, the less you need to prove yourself to others.
If you don't learn the first time you're given another opportunity.
Success is wonderful but significance is even better.
Example is not the main thing in influencing others. It is the only thing.
If you can...you should.
For peace of mind, we need to resign as general manager of the universe.
The purpose of life is a life of purpose.
Life will bring you pain all by itself. Your responsibility is to create joy.
I am only one, but I still am one. I cannot do everything, but still I can do something. I will not refuse to do the something I can do.
Some goals are so worthy, it's glorious even to fail.
There is no experience better for the heart than reaching down and lifting people up.
We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.
It's not hard to make decisions when you know what your values are.
When we direct our thoughts properly, we can control our emotions.
All I want to do is change the world.
You have not done enough, you have never done enough so long as it is possible that you have something of value to contribute.
First, it is probably best to define what I mean when I say “integrity.” It means: “No smoke‚ no mirrors, no tricks … straight down the middle.” It means no exaggerations, no dissembling; just the “real deal.”
You're not supposed to tell your children what to do. You're supposed to let them watch you do it.
It is better to light one candle than to curse the darkness.
No man resolved to make the most of himself can spare time for personal contention.
Anger is the poorest counsellor.
Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools talk because they have to say something.
We need to reconcile our differences through reason, debate and compromise.
If everyone demanded peace instead of another television set, then there'd be peace.
We see the world not as it is....but as we are.
Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.
There are two great days in a person's life - the day we are born and the day we discover why.
I will not surrender responsibility for my life and my actions.
The true meaning of life is to plant trees, under whose shade you do not expect to sit.
The ultimate measure of a person is not where they stand in moments of comfort and convenience, but where the stand in times of challenge and controversy.
The secret of being miserable is to have the leisure to bother about whether you are happy or not. The cure is occupation.
Live so that when your children think of fairness and integrity, they think of you.
Life is not lost by dying; life is lost minute by minute, day by dragging day, in all the thousand small uncaring ways.
Men of genius are admired, men of wealth are envied, men of power are feared; but only men of character are trusted.
In everyone's life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit.
Honesty is the first chapter of the book of wisdom.
Real integrity is doing the right thing, knowing that nobody's going to know whether you did it or not.
If you have integrity, nothing else matters.
One cool judgment is worth a thousand hasty counsels. The thing to do is to supply light and not heat.
Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one getting burned.
Those who know don't talk. Those who talk don't know.
Never talk when you could nod.
It occurs to me, that you spend too much time trying to be interesting,” he said. “Why don’t you invest more time being interested.”
For people to be true leaders, they have to first see things as they are, not worse. Then see it better than it is, and then make it the way you see it.
It has done me good to be somewhat parched by the sun and drenched by the rain of life.
Every year of my life, I grow more convinced that it is wisest and best to fix our attention on the beautiful and the good and dwell as little as possible on the evil and false.
If we don't have a silver bullet, relentless incrementalism is the least we can do.
Most of us miss out on life's big prizes. The Pulitzer, the Nobel, Oscars, Tonys, Emmys. But we are all eligible for life's small pleasures. A pat on the back. A kiss behind the ear. A four pound bass. A full moon. An empty parking space. A crackling fire. A great meal. A glorious sunset. Hot soup. Cold beer. Don't fret about life's grand awards. Enjoys it's tiny delights. There are plenty for all of us.
Most people try to get more everyday while I strive to grow simpler and more uncomplicated everyday.
I cannot believe that the purpose of life is to be happy. I think the purpose of life is to be useful, to be responsible, to be compassionate. It is, above all to matter, to count, to stand for something, to have made some difference that you lived at all.
The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, but wiser people so full of doubts.
Healing may not be so much about getting better, as about letting go of everything that isn't you - all of the expectations, all of the beliefs - and becoming who you are.
.Let his Air, his Manner, and Behaviour, be easy, courteous and Affable, void of every Thing haughty or assuming; his Words few, express’d with Modesty, and a Respect for those he talks to. Be he ever ready to hear what others say; let him interrupt no Body, nor intrude with his Advice unask’d. Let him never trouble other People about his own Affairs, nor concern himself with theirs. Let him avoid Disputes; and when he dissents from others propose his Reasons with Calmness and Complaisance. Be his Wit ever guided by Discretion and Good Nature, nor let him sacrifice a Friend to raise a Laugh. Let him not censure others, nor expose their Failings, but kindly excuse or hide them. Let him neither raise nor propagate a Story to the Prejudice of any Body. In short, be his Study to command his own Temper, to learn the Humours of Mankind, and to conform himself accordingly.Benjamin Franklin
Six essential qualities that are the key to success: Sincerity, personal integrity, humility, courtesy, wisdom, charity.
I appreciate people who are civil, whether they mean it or not. I think: Be civil. Do not cherish your opinion over my feelings. There's a vanity to candor that isn't really worth it. Be kind.
Being happy doesn't mean everything's perfect. It means you've decided to see beyond the imperfections.
The person I have to beat is the guy I was last week.
The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeing new landscapes but in having new eyes.
The only thing you will take to the grave is that which you've given away.
Think like a man of action, act like a man of thought.
Be cheerful, also, and seek not external help, nor the peace which others give. A man must stand straight, and not be kept straight by others.
Most people rush after pleasure so fast that they rush right past it.
Happiness comes by giving it away.
Be a person of depth and insight in a world filled with so many conversations that say a lot about nothing.
Your daily actions broadcast your deepest beliefs.
I am going to concentrate on what's important in life. I'm going to strive everyday to be a kind and generous and loving person. I'm going to keep death right here, so that anytime I even think about getting angry at you or anybody else, I'll see death and I'll remember.
"To handle yourself, use your head. To handle others, use your heart."
It is not giving children more that spoils them; it is giving them more to avoid confrontation.
There is only one success. To be able to spend your life in your own way.
You only get to be the best if you're the one with the clearest vision.
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.
If you're going to be able to look back on something and laugh why not laugh about it now?
Listen or your tongue will make you deaf.
Forget about the brick you laid before. Forget about the next brick. Focus on the brink in your hand that you're laying right now
This is the true joy of life....being used for a purpose recognized by yourself as a mighty one....being a force of nature instead of a feverish selfish little clod of ailments and grievances complaining that the world will not devote itself to making you happy....I am of the opinion that my life belongs to the whole community and as long as I live it is my privilege to do for it whatever I can. I want to be thoroughly used up when I die. For the harder I work the more I live.
'What if today is the day? Am I ready? Am I doing all I need to do? Am I being the person I want to be?'
The best remedy for a short temper is a long walk.
Action is the foundation of success.
Experience is what you get when you don't get what you want.
"What you do speaks so loudly I can't hear what you say".
What you get in life is what you have the courage to ask for.
The happiest people don’t necessarily have the best of everything. They just
make the best of everything.
If you could kick the person responsible for most of your troubles, you would not be able to sit down for six months.
We are where we are because of the choices that we make for ourselves.
Life is what happens while you're busy making excuses.
It is amazing what can be accomplished,
When you don't care who gets the credit.
The only person you need to prove anything to
is yourself.
Luck is when preparation meets opportunity.
While it is wise to learn from experience it is wiser to learn from the experience of others.
Life isn't about how to survive the storm but how to dance in the rain.
Try not to become a man of success but rather try to become a man of value.
All my growth and development led me to believe that if you really do the right thing, and if you play by the rules, and if you've got good enough, solid judgment and common sense, that you're going to be able to do whatever you want to do with your life.
My will shall shape the future. Whether I fail or succeed shall be no man's doing but my own. I am the force; I can clear any obstacle before me or I can be lost in the maze. My choice; my responsibility; win or lose, only I hold the key to my destiny.
Shallow men believe in luck. Strong men believe in cause and effect.
The best sermon is a good example.
We must live what we want others to learn.
If you don't like something change it.
If you can't change it change your attitude.
Don't complain.
When I die I want people to be able to tell the difference.
If others can do such wonderful things why can't I?
It doesn't matter how long you have forgotten only how soon you remember.
Happiness hates the timid.
Leadership is doing what is right when nobody is watching.
Too many people don't care what happens so long as it doesn't happen to them.
Stop wishing for fewer problems and start searching for greater wisdom.
Don't be so busy striving to make a living that you forget to live a life.
"The definition of success--To laugh much; to win respect of intelligent persons and the affections of children; to earn the approbation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty; to find the best in others; to give one's self; to leave the world a little better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch, or a redeemed social condition.; to have played and laughed with enthusiasm, and sung with exultation; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived--this is to have succeeded." -
"You don't get to choose how you're going to die. Or when. You can only decide how you're going to live. Now."
The best things in life aren't things.
Happiness comes not from getting what you want but wanting what you have.
...lived as an ordinary man willing to say extraordinary things and then, with the highest amount of integrity, live the principles he prescribed, to walk his talk with humility and grace.
You are what you do. First do good, then feel good.
The more you behave in certain ways the more it comes to define you, not only to others but to yourself.
I have changed my life from talking, whining, rehashing, complaining and suffering into a life of doing and enduring because I got tired. I got tired of MAKING THE CHOICE to have a bad attitude. I realized that I alone am responsible for my behaviours and moods and whining and the rest of that nonsense is futile to resolution and problem solving.
When he was growing up my son constantly asked for piggyback rides. Though I knew how much he loved them, I was always too busy to play with him. I had reports to read or meetings to attend or calls to make. Now that he has grown up and left home, I have realized one thing: I would give anything in the world to give that boy a piggyback ride.
If it's going to be it's up to me.
The more you are as a person, the less you need to prove yourself to others.
If you don't learn the first time you're given another opportunity.
Success is wonderful but significance is even better.
Example is not the main thing in influencing others. It is the only thing.
If you can...you should.
For peace of mind, we need to resign as general manager of the universe.
The purpose of life is a life of purpose.
Life will bring you pain all by itself. Your responsibility is to create joy.
I am only one, but I still am one. I cannot do everything, but still I can do something. I will not refuse to do the something I can do.
Some goals are so worthy, it's glorious even to fail.
There is no experience better for the heart than reaching down and lifting people up.
We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.
It's not hard to make decisions when you know what your values are.
When we direct our thoughts properly, we can control our emotions.
All I want to do is change the world.
You have not done enough, you have never done enough so long as it is possible that you have something of value to contribute.
First, it is probably best to define what I mean when I say “integrity.” It means: “No smoke‚ no mirrors, no tricks … straight down the middle.” It means no exaggerations, no dissembling; just the “real deal.”
You're not supposed to tell your children what to do. You're supposed to let them watch you do it.
It is better to light one candle than to curse the darkness.
No man resolved to make the most of himself can spare time for personal contention.
Anger is the poorest counsellor.
Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools talk because they have to say something.
We need to reconcile our differences through reason, debate and compromise.
If everyone demanded peace instead of another television set, then there'd be peace.
We see the world not as it is....but as we are.
Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.
There are two great days in a person's life - the day we are born and the day we discover why.
I will not surrender responsibility for my life and my actions.
The true meaning of life is to plant trees, under whose shade you do not expect to sit.
The ultimate measure of a person is not where they stand in moments of comfort and convenience, but where the stand in times of challenge and controversy.
The secret of being miserable is to have the leisure to bother about whether you are happy or not. The cure is occupation.
Live so that when your children think of fairness and integrity, they think of you.
Life is not lost by dying; life is lost minute by minute, day by dragging day, in all the thousand small uncaring ways.
Men of genius are admired, men of wealth are envied, men of power are feared; but only men of character are trusted.
In everyone's life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit.
Honesty is the first chapter of the book of wisdom.
Real integrity is doing the right thing, knowing that nobody's going to know whether you did it or not.
If you have integrity, nothing else matters.
One cool judgment is worth a thousand hasty counsels. The thing to do is to supply light and not heat.
Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one getting burned.
Those who know don't talk. Those who talk don't know.
Never talk when you could nod.
It occurs to me, that you spend too much time trying to be interesting,” he said. “Why don’t you invest more time being interested.”
For people to be true leaders, they have to first see things as they are, not worse. Then see it better than it is, and then make it the way you see it.
It has done me good to be somewhat parched by the sun and drenched by the rain of life.
Every year of my life, I grow more convinced that it is wisest and best to fix our attention on the beautiful and the good and dwell as little as possible on the evil and false.
If we don't have a silver bullet, relentless incrementalism is the least we can do.
Most of us miss out on life's big prizes. The Pulitzer, the Nobel, Oscars, Tonys, Emmys. But we are all eligible for life's small pleasures. A pat on the back. A kiss behind the ear. A four pound bass. A full moon. An empty parking space. A crackling fire. A great meal. A glorious sunset. Hot soup. Cold beer. Don't fret about life's grand awards. Enjoys it's tiny delights. There are plenty for all of us.
Most people try to get more everyday while I strive to grow simpler and more uncomplicated everyday.
I cannot believe that the purpose of life is to be happy. I think the purpose of life is to be useful, to be responsible, to be compassionate. It is, above all to matter, to count, to stand for something, to have made some difference that you lived at all.
The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, but wiser people so full of doubts.
Healing may not be so much about getting better, as about letting go of everything that isn't you - all of the expectations, all of the beliefs - and becoming who you are.
.Let his Air, his Manner, and Behaviour, be easy, courteous and Affable, void of every Thing haughty or assuming; his Words few, express’d with Modesty, and a Respect for those he talks to. Be he ever ready to hear what others say; let him interrupt no Body, nor intrude with his Advice unask’d. Let him never trouble other People about his own Affairs, nor concern himself with theirs. Let him avoid Disputes; and when he dissents from others propose his Reasons with Calmness and Complaisance. Be his Wit ever guided by Discretion and Good Nature, nor let him sacrifice a Friend to raise a Laugh. Let him not censure others, nor expose their Failings, but kindly excuse or hide them. Let him neither raise nor propagate a Story to the Prejudice of any Body. In short, be his Study to command his own Temper, to learn the Humours of Mankind, and to conform himself accordingly.Benjamin Franklin
Six essential qualities that are the key to success: Sincerity, personal integrity, humility, courtesy, wisdom, charity.
I appreciate people who are civil, whether they mean it or not. I think: Be civil. Do not cherish your opinion over my feelings. There's a vanity to candor that isn't really worth it. Be kind.
Being happy doesn't mean everything's perfect. It means you've decided to see beyond the imperfections.
The person I have to beat is the guy I was last week.
The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeing new landscapes but in having new eyes.
The only thing you will take to the grave is that which you've given away.
Think like a man of action, act like a man of thought.
Be cheerful, also, and seek not external help, nor the peace which others give. A man must stand straight, and not be kept straight by others.
Most people rush after pleasure so fast that they rush right past it.
Happiness comes by giving it away.
Be a person of depth and insight in a world filled with so many conversations that say a lot about nothing.
Your daily actions broadcast your deepest beliefs.
I am going to concentrate on what's important in life. I'm going to strive everyday to be a kind and generous and loving person. I'm going to keep death right here, so that anytime I even think about getting angry at you or anybody else, I'll see death and I'll remember.
"To handle yourself, use your head. To handle others, use your heart."
It is not giving children more that spoils them; it is giving them more to avoid confrontation.
There is only one success. To be able to spend your life in your own way.
You only get to be the best if you're the one with the clearest vision.
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.
If you're going to be able to look back on something and laugh why not laugh about it now?
Listen or your tongue will make you deaf.
Forget about the brick you laid before. Forget about the next brick. Focus on the brink in your hand that you're laying right now
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